Monday, June 4, 2012

Narcissism

Somebody asked me to define "narcissism" the other day.  This was my explanation:

"...But basically that word refers to the core conviction/demand/expectation that one's own thoughts, feelings, experiences ought to be understood and anticipated and adhered to by all in that person's environment.  It is egocentrism - self at the center.  It doesn't make room for "otherness" or separateness.  Differences in understanding, ideas, emotional response, etc are treated as a threat and therefore punished or annihilated.   It's the sense that  'There is only one correct way to think, feel or act and mine is it!'
If you missed Disney's portrayal of Rapunzel in Tangled, I recommend you watch it if only because they nailed the persona of the narcissistic parent.  The witch who represents herself as Rapunzel's mother keeps her locked away in a tower isolating her from world to 'protect her' from the evils of the world.  Actually, her intent is to serve her own need for power, beauty, adoration and control.  For a time she is successful in maintaining the child's collusion in her fantasy of herself as the hero.  When Rapunzel begins to develop a separate self, the witch punishes her with the confusing message and plaintiff martyrs cry, 'Now I'm the bad guy?'" I chuckle at that every time I see it.

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