I call em "gurlz," but whatever.

I'm reblogging, because  I have found this one to be an important discussion.  At least it seems to be a continuation of the discussion found here at tenthstreetradicals.

Check out the links embedded below and mull it over.  For those who would criticise that I spend too much time in popular philosophy and not enough in the word, that's probably true to a large degree of all of us.  However, let me challenge: When we read the Bible, do we notice the role of women or rather, God's appointment and direction of women ?  Counter-cultural women? Women who defy man's laws in order to honor God? Women who are courageously first and tenaciously last on the scene?  Women who are used by God to change the course of history?  Women with whom Jesus speaks, to whom he brings liberation, whom He commissions, restores, promises, meets up?  Seems to me Jesus is egalitarian.  Jesus is the philosophy I embrace.

Biblical feminism and third wave feminism
"(W)e are in a special position to add egalitarian Christianity. We can invite another generation to realize that loving God and advancing feminism are not mutually exclusive goals. For this generation, however, textual arguments about the ancient Greek connotations of headship and the convert behavior at Ephesus are less important than our personal stories of all the different ways God has influenced our identities as feminists, and how we have struggled toward our feminist commitment to equality among God’s people."

The theological positions underlying the "Christian" side of this debate are colored by whether one is complementarian vs egalitarian.  Each finds support and justification in the Word.  The way you lean probably is less determined by your commitment to Jesus, but more by your particular faith community and culture as illustrated by Jenny Rae Armstrong's blog. 

Narcissism

Somebody asked me to define "narcissism" the other day.  This was my explanation:

"...But basically that word refers to the core conviction/demand/expectation that one's own thoughts, feelings, experiences ought to be understood and anticipated and adhered to by all in that person's environment.  It is egocentrism - self at the center.  It doesn't make room for "otherness" or separateness.  Differences in understanding, ideas, emotional response, etc are treated as a threat and therefore punished or annihilated.   It's the sense that  'There is only one correct way to think, feel or act and mine is it!'

If you missed Disney's portrayal of Rapunzel in Tangled, I recommend you watch it if only because they nailed the persona of the narcissistic parent.  The witch who represents herself as Rapunzel's mother keeps her locked away in a tower isolating her from world to 'protect her' from the evils of the world.  Actually, her intent is to serve her own need for power, beauty, adoration and control.  For a time she is successful in maintaining the child's collusion in her fantasy of herself as the hero.  When Rapunzel begins to develop a separate self, the witch punishes her with the confusing message and plaintiff martyrs cry, 'Now I'm the bad guy?'" I chuckle at that every time I see it.

Manliness?

I don't know if any of my friends who live at a distance have been checking here to see how the discussion is going since our first meeting.  I anticipate there are at least a couple who were  intending on participating by proxy here.  I haven't forgotten about you and want to acknowledge your desire to take part in this journey.  May God bless and reward you in seeking to be an encouragement to the men in your life as an affirmer of masculinity!

A small contingent of women did indeed gather for food, accountability and encouragement.  And God made himself known!  The time of sharing was sweet, and transparent and every woman's dignity as well as that of her husband's was honored. Such was our intent and covenant.  Pursuant to that endeavor - we are maintaining confidentiality of group members.  There is ongoing private discussion.

The intent of the blog will heretofore be to examine cultural and philosophical forces, ideologies, attitudes or biases that pervade our relationships with men.  It will serve as adjunctive material for those who wish to take it deeper or broader.   I've had these links saved in my blog "drafts" for some time thinking I would eventually find or make the time to comment at length, but that just hasn't come to fruition.  I don't necessarily have clear opinions of either of these links.  I'm curious about GodMen, ie how is it helping men reconnect to faith? Video here

I consistently find myself intrigued by this website with its seemingly fresh perspectives on manhood.  It is very informative and entertaining, IMO.
The Art of Manliness

Have fun perusing!

Into the wilds. . .

Ready for controversy?
One idea I've been stretched by is the concept that men are by nature wild.  Women tend to want to tame them, and then wonder why their men loose their vitality, ie passion.  I find Esther Perel's ideas to be infusing vitality in my couples work.  What is so interesting is that she is challenging feminism/egalitarianism and sexual liberation as part of the reason eroticism in many marriages is waning.  She illustrates how domesticity spells the death of passion and responds to that dilemma by encouraging eroticism, not just sexuality.  She advocates NOT necessarily more frequent sex but more connected alive sex. Her secular perspective is one that honors truth.  That is refreshing coming from a humanist.  She is clearly existentialist, too.  Still it's good stuff!

One of her many videos on Youtube:

We'll get started. . .

...reading and discussing the book,For Women Only during the second half of April.  Woman are encouraged to find a friend with whom to discuss and process the content face to face.  The blog is here to facilitate additional discussion and to  make it possible for women to participate, regardless of time or location.

My friend, Cheri has been blogging  to women for nearly a year.  She has written some thought-provoking posts that correspond to the main theme here, ie being an encouragement for men so that they may have freedom in faith in Jesus to freedom to express themselves authentically. Cheri's blog can be found here  and her thoughts on how a woman should respond to the movie, Courageous.  Take some time to look at her posts.  They're good!  I responded in her comment section about Courageous, because I thought she raised an important topic; one that is close to my heart.

I'd like to know what you think about the notion that many wives try to be the Holy Spirit to their husbands.  Do our crusades to get our guys to "man up" tend to be counter-productive.  Why?

Incidentally, if you would like to comment, you may need to click on the word, "comments"  or on the pencil in the highlighted area.  A window should pop up.  You my have to copy the words you see and then click "submit".  I am moderating comments in order to filter certain variables.  Thus, it may take some time for your comment to appear.  I will try to respond, thoughtfully.  Mostly I'm screening against abuse.  If you want to challenge something or add a thought, even seemingly tangential thoughts, that would actually be encouraged!